Looking Back on a Year of Blessings

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.  For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—  to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.  In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding,  he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ. 
Ephesians 1:3-10

At this time one year ago, we were in Panama on vacation. I remember looking forward to the end of 2011 because it had been a year full of hardships. The happiness of getting married had been overshadowed by my father's illness and eventual passing and by the immigration journey that we had just begun. There was no sadness in saying good-bye to 2011, that was for sure! I was hoping that 2012 would be as full of blessings as 2011 was full of heartaches. I am very blessed to say that it sure was!

As I just mentioned, we started off 2012 in Panama surrounded by family. We have many memories that will last a lifetime from that trip. It was a way for us all to get away from the worries back home for just a little bit and to enjoy God's beautiful creation and each other, not to mention that I got to spend two full weeks with Raul. Total number of pics from that trip? 6,000! For those of you who know my mother, that should not be a surprise.

Though Raul was planning on moving out of his grandpa's house after this trip to go to a bigger city to find a job, he started feeling more at home in his small pueblo of Santa Monica. Soon his days were filled with helping his grandpa doing various jobs, playing cards with "the guys", taking swims in the river, and fighting crime as a comandante. ;) The decision was made that unless something changed, he would continue to stay with his grandparents.

In March, I took vacation #2 of 2012 and flew to Mexico City to visit Raul. From there, we took a bus to the city of Puebla. Puebla is a beautiful city. I like it much better than Mexico City because it doesn't feel as crowed to me and I could walk on the sidewalks without being bumped into all of the time. We also took a 4 hour bus ride to Raul's "hometown" to visit his family and so I could see where he lived. Though it was way out of my comfort zone, I am very thankful that I had this opportunity because now I can actually picture the places and the people he speaks of when we have our daily chats on the phone.

On July 4th, I left for vacation #3 of 2012. It was pretty much a repeat of vacation #2. We stayed in the same hotel as before because it was very affordable, yet very clean. I don't need luxury, but cleanliness is a must! The presidential election in Mexico had just taken place and we participated in  a protest because, apparently, we did not agree with the way the election was handled. In reality, marching was the only way to get down the block and across the street, but...

In August, I started my counseling practicum with an organization called Teen Mother Choices (TMC). I was given the opportunity to have three clients of my own and to participate in  the life skills workshops that are held weekly. This opportunity has been a gift from God. Working with these young mothers has truly been a blessing to me, and I was excited to see their personal growth in just one semester. In addition to the the girls, I was able to connect with the mentor moms that work with them. I have learned a lot from them. I really clicked with one of the mentor moms, Lauren, and we have built a friendship outside of just our weekly meetings. I love new friends! Though I will not get any type of school credit, I have decided to volunteer at TMC for the Spring semester. I will be able to do a little budget counseling and will be pitching in wherever else I'm needed.

On November 21, one day before I left on vacation #4 of 2012, we received one of the biggest blessings of the year. Raul's waiver was approved and he will be coming home (we still don't know when)! In the airport of Cancun, I was able to show him the letter. Cancun was beautiful and the good-bye at the end of that trip was more like a, "I'll see you in a couple months!".

Looking back on the year, I am overwhelmed and humbled by God's outpouring of blessings on us. In addition to all of my vacations and Raul's waiver approval, he blessed us in many other ways. He provided for us financially. How in the world was I able to afford all of those vacations?! (Thank you to all of you who have given us gifts toward those extras by the way!) I don't know what I would have done without my friend Jen. She not only provided a place for me to live but she has also been a great support for me through all of this. We have had some great roommate bonding experiences!  I am grateful for my sister Vonya and brother-in-law Oscar and all of the support they have given us this past year. I am so thankful that I will not have to move far away from them and their crazy (yet very lovable) kids.  The list of blessings could go on and on...


I'm finishing up 2012 in Iowa with my mom and family here. What a blessing it has been to have my whole family here to support me through this year of waiting. I cannot express how much it meant to us that everyone was so excited for us (and for themselves) when they heard the news that Raul is coming home. We Gizzos are excited (and a little bit nervous, I must admit) to see what God has in store for us in 2013. It will be a year of transitions and decisions about the future. Raul will be readjusting to the pace of life in the U.S. and I will be, hopefully, starting my internship. We are eagerly anticipating the day when we will be able to purchase a home and will finally be able to use all of the wedding presents that we received over a year ago. Praise God that house will be in the U.S.! Happy New Year to you all with much love from the Gizzos!

No More Mexican Vacations...Praise the Lord!

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. Ephesians 3:16-21

This is the blog post that I have been waiting to write ever since I first started this blog. I believe that this is the post that many of you have been eagerly anticipating as well. So...without beating around the bush, I am overjoyed to say RAUL IS COMING HOME TO THE U.S.! Though I have known the news now for almost 2 weeks, it still seems unreal. God certainly did do even more than I had even dared to imagine. He timed the letter to come the day before I left to Cancun to spend Thanksgiving with Raul. Instead of telling him over the phone, I was able to show him the letter in person. 

I must say that this moment was nothing like I had expected it to be. The letter was supposed to come to my house so that Raul and I could be the only ones to know for a while. Instead, the letter went to my sister's house and she broke the news to me over the phone while I was at the salon in Wal-Mart waiting for my pedicure (high class, I know!). Though I wanted her to wait and to let me come home and open it, she convinced me to let her open it since she was "90% sure the letter said approved". How did she know this you may ask? She and my mom held the letter up to the light! I gathered from the screaming on the other end of the line after she opened it that she was 100% sure. Though my roommie, who happened to be with me at the time, teared up at the news (bless her heart), I was pretty much in shock! 

We did not immediately spread the news because we wanted to make sure that his family knew before other people. Just this afternoon, I was able to be at his parents' house when he broke the news to his mom and the rest of his family over the phone. What a relief to everyone! It was like an early Christmas.

Though we know for sure he is coming home, we do not know when. He still has to be entered into the system and then he will have to travel to Juarez for another medical exam and maybe some other things. In typical Raul fashion, after he was able to speak when I showed him the letter he said, "But I want to make sure to stay until the Fiesta de Enero is over".  So, we know for sure he will not be home until the end of January or longer (even if he could be). :)

Thank you so much to all of you for your prayers! This is truly a miracle of God that The Gizzos will soon be reunited on this side of the border. I will finally be able to pick him up from the airport! God's timing is indeed perfect and we are excited to see the things he has planned for us in Waukegan (or perhaps somewhere else?). Though the journey has not always been easy, He supplied us with joy and many blessings along the way. God is GOOD. Praise be to God!

Thanksgiving

 ^"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6

Though I was trying to hold out and make my husband do the traveling for our next rendezvous, word that what I was hoping would be a 6 month wait may be more like a 10 month wait prompted me to bite the bullet and buy another ticket to visit my love on Thanksgiving break. It just so happens that tickets to Cancun were cheaper than tickets to Mexico City, so I will be meeting Raul in Cancun on the day before Thanksgiving. I mean, what was a girl to do? :) This trip will be shorter than the others--just one day shy of a week. But, at least it gives me something to count down to.

Though, I know that the likelihood of me getting "the letter" this early is slim to none, I still can't help but eagerly check the mail everyday when I get home and then be a little disappointed when there is nothing there. I can only imagine the mix of emotions I will feel when I check and there is something there. I think I will have to work up my courage to actually open the envelope. We have been waiting for years and it seems strange to think that at some point (hopefully soon) we will have a final answer.

Though the semester at Trinity has officially started, things don't really get into full swing for me until next week when I start my Tuesday night meetings with Teen Mother Choices and my Wednesday night Vantage Point 3 class at church. I'm hoping the semester will fly by once I no longer have much of any free time. ;) I had originally thought that my practicum would be pretty low key and that I would just be sitting in on some group work with the girls and lead a few discussions. However, I am told that I will be getting one or two of my own counseling clients. The thought scares me to death, but I know it will be good experience for me and help me to be less anxious if/when I get to internship.

Raul has started a new "business" of selling boom boxes that he purchases in Puebla. So far he has only made one trip to the city to get his supply, but he was able to sell all the boom boxes that he had picked up. His form of advertisement is to walk down the street with the his music blaring. Who wouldn't want a boom box so they could be cool like him?

As always, thank you everyone for your support and encouragement. Please pray for me as I try to wait patiently for both Thanksgiving break and for the letter. I have been feeling a bit more lonely lately even though I have wonderful friends and family around me. Pray also for Raul. Though he is in good spirits, he has mentioned on a couple of occasions that he is ready for this part of the journey to be over as well. Pray also that God would provide opportunities for him to share his faith with a couple of guys that he met in Chiautla when he was there last. One of them opened up to Raul about some very deep hurts that he had and Raul was able to introduce the topic of Christ's healing, but he would love to follow up with that and build a relationship with them.

I was able to speak at our church last Sunday on the topic of God's faithfulness and was convicted afresh at how faithful God has been to us not only during this time of wandering but in all of the time leading up to this waiting period. It is obvious that God has been preparing us for whatever he has planned next for us. It is hard for me to be patient to see what that is and to learn the lessons that he has for me in the mean time. Yet, in my heart of hearts, I know God's timing has always been perfect and it will continue to be. That is one of the many promises I cling to.

In Good Hands

I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power  that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the heavenly realms.  Now he is far above any ruler or authority or power or leader or anything else—not only in this world but also in the world to come. God has put all things under the authority of Christ and has made him head over all things for the benefit of the church. And the church is his body; it is made full and complete by Christ, who fills all things everywhere with himself. Ephesians 1:19-23

I came to the passage above a couple of days ago, and words cannot describe how much I needed that reminder. Though I would never pass up the opportunity to visit Raul in Mexico, stepping foot in that country amplifies my fears regarding our situation. No matter how hard I try to just relax, I find thoughts about what would happen if I had to live there creeping into my mind. How would I adjust to the cultural differences, learn the language, and find a job? What would I do if I had to leave my friends and family? Yet, I know that if God's plan for the Gizzos includes us living in Mexico, then he already has the details figured out as well. Sometimes, though, I need a reminder of this fact.

If only I could really understand the "incredible greatness of God's power for us who believe in him". Nothing is impossible with God. My God is the same God who raised Christ from the dead. Is anything too hard for him? Certainly not! God pays no attention to our odds of Raul getting his residence or being denied. Whatever happens is his plan because we have placed this in his hands, not only Raul and I but also the hundreds of people (yes, I really believe we have that many people) praying for us. Whatever happens, will be his plan for us. But, more than that, it will benefit his Church. Our happiness is not his number one goal, though I am sure that he will continue to bring us peace and joy. We are here to bring glory to God and to benefit His body here on earth. We were created for a purpose. That knowledge is truly a comfort and at times it is all I can do to cling to that so that I don't have a complete meltdown. 

All of our paperwork proving (or at least trying to prove) our "extreme" hardship has now been turned in and all we can do now is wait. I do have to admit that part of me was hoping that I would somehow be slightly injured or get robbed while I was in Mexico so that I could send that in as "proof" that Mexico was too dangerous for me to live in. Yes, maybe you should pray for my sanity! :) The letter we got in April said we may have up to 12 more months to wait. We're hoping it will be closer to 6 like our lawyer suggested it may be. It would be great if Raul could be home for our first snow storm of the season. 

Though each trip is hard for me for the reason I stated above, it is also a reminder of how truly blessed I am to have Raul as a husband. Though we are polar opposites in some areas, he balances me out perfectly. He is so patient with me and my insecurities. He can always make me smile, even when I don't want to. His love of life and people truly challenges me to do the same. Who would've thought that the guy I started dating because I was his GED tutor would teach me so much?! I must admit that sometimes I feel a bit sorry for myself that I don't get to come home to my hubby after work.  But then, I realize how blessed I am that I even have a hubby that I love and miss so much. 

Some of you have asked how Raul is. Well, Raul is still Raul.  Wherever he goes, he finds a friend. He has his guys he plays basketball with, his guys he plays cards with, and his fellow comandantes that he fights crime with. :) He has been spending a lot more time in the Word (thanks to not having a T.V.), and I can see the work that God is doing in him. His faith in God and his plan for us really is an example to me. Though he feels at home in Santa Monica now, his heart is still with Waukegan. It's hard to explain, but even though Raul has been living in Mexico close to a year now and his Spanish has improved tremendously, he still has a Waukegan "flavor" to him. In fact, we were often asked by Taxi drivers where we were from and no one believed him that he was living in Puebla until he had gone through our whole story. While we were in Mexico City, some guy on the street even tried to sell him a fake Mexican I.D.!  So...Raul is doing well, but he misses "home". 

I miss my honey a lot and am actually looking forward to the start of the school year since that seems to make time pass more quickly. I will be doing my practicum this Fall and taking a modular course. In addition, I have a discipleship course called VP3 that I will be leading at church.  I am secretly hoping that Raul will be home before the semester ends, but I guess that's up to God. Thanks again to all of you for your prayers and support. Please take a listen to the song in the video below. It's a great encouragement!

 

Friends, lovers, and...activists?

It is strange to think that it has only been a few days since I last saw Raul as we said goodbye at airport security on Tuesday.  As I look forward to hopefully hearing "good news" sometime in the near future, the days cannot go fast enough it seems. However, the 13 days that I got to spend with Raul did fly by much faster than I wanted them too. 

Raul in his new Journey Church t-shirt

We both greatly enjoyed my latest visit to Mexico. (Well, at least I think Raul did as well!) I flew in to Mexico City on the 4th of July and we stayed the first 3 nights of my visit there before we headed to Puebla. For the first night, we found what the person at the airport called a good hotel for a reasonable price. I will say that it was pretty cheap and the location was good. In addition, the room was clean. However, when we opened the door to our room, I was surprised by how tiny it was and the fact that the wall that divided the bathroom from the bedroom did not go clear up to the ceiling. I know we're married and all, but I guess we're enough of newlyweds yet that I wasn't too keen on the fact that what was done in the bathroom could be heard (or smelled) by the one who was not in the bathroom. Needless to say, we only stayed there the first night. The second night, we stayed a Hotel Marlowe. We ended up getting a good deal on it from hotels.com. It was a good location, quiet, clean, had a purified water faucet for drinking water, and the bathroom walls went clear up to the ceiling. What more could a girl ask for?!

Raul being a good Samaritan in Puebla 

We took the bus to Puebla for the next two nights and ended up staying in the same hotel that we had been in before. Why mess with a good thing? The highlight of this brief stay in Puebla was marching in a protest regarding the recent election of Mexico's next president. We mainly joined the crowd so we could move down the block and across the street to our hotel, but Raul did vote for the same guy that this movement was supporting so we joined in the chanting as well. :)

  

Raul's Street

On Monday, we traveled 4 hours by bus to Raul's town, Santa Monica. Because it is the rainy season there, it was not quite as hot this time around. In fact, after the evening rain, we were probably a little cooler there, than my friends and family in the Midwest. The rain knocked out our power on Monday afternoon, but it came back on Tuesday. Though the rain prevented us from being out and about visiting relatives like my last visit there, it was quite impressive to see it approaching over the foothills. Eventually, the rain completely hid the foothills. On Tuesday, I did get to "meet" all four of the pigs that Raul has been caring for. He is lamenting the fact that one of them is getting almost big enough to eat. For those of you who know Raul, you know he's a softie when it comes to animals and not even living in Mexico can change that about him. 

Our favorite waiter

Sportin' our 20 peso sunglasses on the balcony.

On Wednesday we headed back to the city of Puebla and again stayed in the same hotel. One good thing about it is that it is right across the street from our favorite restaurant and bakery. In the evening and early morning, the smell of fresh baked goods wafts in through the balcony doors. The hotel is also very close to the town square (zocalo) and cinco de Mayo street, where all there are a lot of shops and fun things to look at. We spent most of our time just walking around and looking at things (and people). It rained some in the afternoons and evenings, but that usually didn't last that long and it kept the temperature pretty cool. While my friends in Illinois were experiencing 90 degree weather, we were walking around with our jackets on most of the day.

We stayed in Mexico City my last two nights there. We again found an amazing deal on hotels.com and we stayed at the Gran Hotel Ciudad Mexico. It was much nicer than any of the hotels we had stayed at before and was only a block away from the square. 

I will spare you the smaller details of the trip as this is already a pretty long post. I was truly blessed to be able to take this trip, yet it made me long even more for the day when the end of vacation does not mean saying good-bye to the one I love.  I will be doing a second blog post to bring you up to date with all of the immigration stuff and the waiting in the mean time. 

Thanks again to all of you who made this trip possible by your support--financial, emotional, and prayer.

Count Down Begins Again!

Sixteen days and counting until the Gizzos are reunited again for a short time. I will fly into Mexico City on July 4th and will not have to leave my love until July 17th. My trip this time will be much like the last trip. We plan to stay a few days in Mexico City and then head to Puebla. If all goes according to plan, we will be headed to Santa Monica for a few days as well.

I hope to get the final evidences of "extreme hardship" sent in to immigration before I leave. After this step, all we can do is wait. We're hoping to hear the news (hopefully good) by the end of the year, but the letter said it could be up to 12 months which would make it more like next Spring. Thankfully, I will be pretty busy in the Fall and am hoping that this will make the time pass for me a bit more quickly.

I finally got all of the details worked out and I will be completing my practicum for school with an organization called Teen Mother Choices. In addition, I get to lead a class/small group at our church called Vantage Point 3. Both Raul and I participated in it a couple years ago and we still talk about the many lessons that we learned about God and about ourselves during that course. One project that is assigned is to write a personal narrative. So much has happened in the past year that I am not sure how I will limit mine to the 10 pages that is allotted for the assignment!

Raul has also been keeping busy lately. His role as volunteer police officer has supplied him with quite a few interesting stories. He has "towed" donkeys because they were illegally "parked" on the road. He has spent a night outside of the jail because it was his duty to stay there after he put someone in there for the night. And, he has broken up more than his fair share of fights at weddings. I am so thankful that Raul can see the humor in so many things. I am pretty sure that I would have a much worse attitude if I were the one down there waiting.

Thank you again to all of you who faithfully pray for us and ask us how we're doing. You will never know how much your prayers mean to us. Please pray for me and my family as we are really feeling the loss of my father right now since Father's Day was just here. Mom has been posting many wonderful (and not so wonderful) pictures of back in the day, and I am so thankful for the wonderful memories that we have of him. Pray also that my trip goes smoothly and that God will give me wisdom on the documentation that needs to be sent in. As always, you can continue to pray for peace for us both during this time of waiting.

The waiting is over and just starting

Finally, I have progress of some sort to report even though it is not really the progress I was hoping to report. Raul traveled to Cholula (a town right outside of Puebla) to the DHL location to pick up our letter yesterday. The letter confirmed what we were expecting and our waiver has been referred for further review. Honestly, we were both disappointed with the letter. Even though we knew that most likely it would say we were being referred for further review, we still had that small glimmer of hope that maybe just maybe we would get the word that he could start the process of coming back home. The letter said that it may be another 12 months before a decision is reached in our case. However, my sister said they are currently averaging around 6 months to make decisions after they are referred. 

The only thing holding me together right now is the knowledge that God is still in control and His timing is still perfect even if it does not match my "perfect" timing. Apparently, there are still lessons for us to learn and purposes for us to accomplish before we can move on to the next step. Plus, God must not have wanted my ticket to Mexico for July to go to waste!

We do have some specific prayer requests at this time. One is for wisdom for us on what if any additional documentation we should send in to prove "extreme hardship". Also, our finances are a concern to me (even though God has been providing for us every step of the way). We do have a small amount left in the savings, but I don't think I'll have the luxury of planning any more "vacations" after this one in July. In addition, my car is aging and there are always little things that come up. But, like I said, God has made every dollar of ours stretch more than I could've imagined, so maybe the prayer should be more for me to be able to chill out and trust God! Please also pray for us during this waiting time. As the time for the answer draws nearer, it has been harder for me to trust God's plan and pray instead of being anxious about the end result. Pray also for Raul. He has had a good attitude during this whole journey, but continue to pray for strength and encouragement for him.

Other than that, there is really nothing new to report. There is a wedding in Raul's town this weekend so he helped this morning to butcher a cow for the party. He'll be on duty  as one of the volunteer police officers for the wedding tomorrow. He leads such an exciting life!

Thanks much for your prayers and as usual, keep 'em coming!

An All American (hopefully!) Love Story

 One year ago today, Raul and I stood before God, our family, and our friends and pledged to love, honor, and cherish each other for the rest of our lives. I cannot believe that a year has already flown by. So much has happened between then and now, but I am more happy than ever that I am Mrs. Mozo (or Mrs. Modigidii as some may know me).

Though many of you who are reading probably already know "our story", I thought I would fill the rest of you in in honor of our one year anniversary. Our love story is much like everyone else' and much different than everyone else' at the same time. Looking back, we can see how God's hand was on us each step of the way and how he brought us to the place where we are now.

Raul and I met at a meeting for those who were interested in being part of a church plant called Journey Church. I was intrigued by this Christian bad-boy who had grown up in such a different world. Raul grew up in Waukegan and had been exposed to a lot different "life experiences" than I had in my sheltered farm community in Iowa. Though Raul caught my attention immediately, it wasn't until I started tutoring him in math for his GED that we really got to know each other. Pretty soon one tutoring session a week turned into two. And then, tutoring turned into lets just watch a movie instead.

 Many of our Journey Church friends can probably recall the camping trip where it was obvious that we were interested in each other. It rained the entire trip, so we were forced to spend most of the evening and night in our tents. Raul's was next to mine and we carried on a conversation into the wee hours of the morning. The problem was that we didn't realize that everyone else heard our conversation since we both had to yell over the noise of the rain. Soon after this trip, Raul finally asked me out on our first date and we became "official".

However, something just didn't feel right and we broke up. But, we remained good friends and spoke on the phone frequently. We did eventually get back together and we dated for a couple of years. Then we were to the point where we either needed to make some wedding plans or go our separate ways. There were some things in our relationship that needed work and after praying about it, we both came to the conclusion that we should go our separate ways. I was heart broken, but I still had a peace from God that we had done the right thing. Raul did his thing and I did mine, yet we remained friends and saw each other at church.

During our time apart, Raul was working through some things in his own life and I decided that I needed to assess where I was headed. I had planned on marrying him and living happily ever after, but that wasn't looking like it would ever happen. I decided to go back to school and started really enjoying my life as a student. People kept trying to set me up with guys and I really longed to find someone and to be married, but part of me just didn't want anyone but Raul. I went back and forth between being content with being single and then freaking out that I would never get married since I was nearing my late twenties with no prospects.

Raul went to Las Vegas for a little while and I was sure that I would never hear from him again. Yet, I was one of the first people he called when he got back. He began getting more and more involved with leading the Youth Group at church and little by little, he was turning into the guy that I had always wanted him to be. We started talking more and more on the phone and then we would look for excuses to hang out with each other. Yet, something was holding me back from wanting to commit to a relationship. Raul was still in the midst of his immigration battle and the last thing I wanted to do was to put myself in a position where I would have to move to Mexico!

So, for a long while, we were "just friends" who talked on the phone everyday and occasionally hung out. Then came the fateful day in November, 2009. Raul was supposed to lead small group that evening, but he failed to show up. He didn't answer his phone and no one knew where he was. Later that night, I got a phone call. When I picked up the phone, I heard "will you accept a phone call from inmate number something at the Lake County Jail." Immediately, I knew it was him. Raul had been pulled over for a traffic violation and before releasing him, they ran his name in the immigration database. He had been flagged and they were holding him. I didn't get to talk that long with him and I was a mess for the next two days until I heard from him.  At that point, I feared that he would be deported on the spot and I would never see him again.To spare a you any more details, Raul was released a couple of days later, but the ball was rolling with immigration and he would soon have a court appearance.

From that point on, we were pretty much dating, yet I was really struggling with making it "official" again. I still didn't know if I could leave my country and family for this guy even though I loved him. One night, I had a heart to heart talk with God. I told him that if he wanted us together, he would have to make me so in love with Raul that I would be willing to follow him anywhere. And...that's exactly what happened. We soon became official and our relationship this time was much different than it had looked before. God was the center and we connected with each other on a much deeper level.

On December 11, 2010, Raul told me to sit down because he had something to tell me. I immediately said no because I thought he was going to tell me something bad. He kept asking to hold my hand and I said no because I thought he had done something wrong and he was just trying to soften the blow. Over and over he said, "I have something to tell you can I hold your hand?" Finally, I told him to "just spit it out!" The rest was a blur but somewhere during that time he had gotten on his knee and pulled out a ring. I said, "Are you for real?!" And, that was that! After 7 years of dating off and on, we were finally engaged!

Raul's first immigration court date was at the end of January, and we found out that there was a slight possibility that if it didn't go well, he could be detained and then deported. We made a quick decision to get married prior to that date since I was bound and determined that we would be married in the U.S. I would have preferred to have a ceremony in a church, but my dad had just been diagnosed with lung cancer and was to receive his first chemo treatment, so he couldn't travel. Since my dad wouldn't be able to give me away, we decided that a civil service in the court house would do and then we would have a church wedding if Raul's court date went okay. So, only a month after we got engaged, we were married!

I had originally planned to have our church wedding in June but we decided to move it to April since my dad wasn't doing well. It turns out that my dad wasn't able to give me away anyway since he passed away in March. Though the civil wedding was not in my original plans, it turned out to be a blessing since Dad knew before he died that Raul and I were married and that Raul would take care of me.

On April 23rd, 2011, three hundred of our friends and family celebrated our marriage with us in Waukegan. That day is a bit of a blur to me, but I remember being happy that our marriage ceremony truly was a celebration of God bringing us together. Sometimes I still find it hard to believe that we actually ended up together. What a relief to know that I will get to do life with my best friend by my side. We make a good team and I cannot wait until we get to live together again. Thank you, Lord, for my husband Mr. Modigidii. He is truly a gift from you.

A New Timeline

 Mark 8:35-36

"If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake and for the sake of the Good News, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?"

The Scripture above really hit home for me in this time of waiting. We still have no idea when we will hear from immigration. According to the old timeline, we should've gotten a letter by today stating whether our waiver was approved or whether we were sent for further review. However, it appears that things have changed and the fast track now takes from 2 to 6 months to hear something and the slow track may have to wait an additional 6 months beyond that. So, we really have no idea where we are on the waiting timeline or even which track we're on. All we know is that we are waiting and trusting (or at least trying to trust).

So, why did this passage in Mark speak to me so much? Much of my daily battle is in giving up "my life" for God's life that he has called us to live. God's desire for The Gizzos is that we live the life he has called us to live and the point of that life is not our comfort but for us to bring Him glory and to lead others to Him. I go between arguing with God that really the best place for us is the U.S. and trusting that this is part of his plan and that wherever we end up, He will use our lives as living sacrifices for him. What a joy there can be in living life for the One who created it. Ultimately, my (our) heart's desire is to do what God has called us to do and be where God has called us to be, but sometimes my mind has a little trouble catching  up with my heart!

Raul's phone lines were down for most of last week and a couple of days this week. When we did get to talk, he had much to catch me up on.The biggest news is that he is now a kind of volunteer police officer there in Santa Monica. He was talked into volunteering after some of the other volunteers observed him breaking up some fights and helping an older gentleman back to his home after a celebration. Wednesday nights he is on duty and completes rounds to make sure that stores are closed by a certain time and to generally keep an eye on things. He gets his official credentials and t-shirt at the end of this month! I can't wait to see pictures of my man in uniform! ;)

There's nothing much to report in my neck of the woods. I am planning on visiting Raul in the beginning of July when I get more vacation time for work. Deciding when to buy the tickets has been a bit tricky because I don't really want to throw away money on the off chance that Raul will get approved to come home earlier than thought. However, I don't think I'll even care about the wasted ticket if that's the case!

Thanks again for your love, support, and prayers and keep 'em coming!

Still waiting...patiently (or something)

Exodus 16:8

Moses also said, “You will know that it was the LORD when he gives you meat to eat in the evening and all the bread you want in the morning, because he has heard your grumbling against him. Who are we? You are not grumbling against us, but against the LORD.” 

When I was sharing with Raul all of the lessons I've been learning from those rebellious Israelite people, we discovered that we had both been making our way through the book of Exodus. Raul is speeding through it compared to me, but nonetheless, it has been really fun for us to be able to discuss what we're learning when we talk on the phone. For some reason (probably the Holy Spirit) we're both noticing things about the book that we had never noticed before. My insight from today was a little bit painful. In Exodus 16, God's chosen people seem to have again forgotten the many miracles that God had just performed for them and that he had delivered them from slavery. Instead of choosing to be excited about what God would do next, they decided to complain to Moses about their lack of food. However, they were ultimately complaining about (and to) God. Yet, God was merciful and provided them with manna and quail.

I came to the realization that I too am a complainer. Okay, that wasn't really a new revelation. But, the application that I came up with was a new one. Every time I complain about immigration and how long it takes for them to do anything, I am really complaining about God's timing and his plan he has for us. Ouch! Thank goodness he is merciful, eh?!

I must admit that I am getting antsy to hear something (even if it is that we have been sent for further review). According to the timeline they gave Raul, we have from about 1 to 5 more weeks to wait for the letter. Good thing I have learned my lesson about having patience and not complaining! ;)

There's really not much new to report. Raul was told by his municipal that since he's been living there a while, he has to do some work around the town like everyone else. So, tomorrow is his first day of "service" and he will be helping to pave a road. He has also been helping Lupita build a pen for her new pig that she purchased and has been watching the new baby chicks that hatched under his kitchen table--11 in all. I'm telling you, we're fixing to move to a farm in Iowa when he gets back so he feels at home! 

I've been keeping busy with homework as the end of the semester draws closer. I am hoping to do my practicum next Fall but I've hit a snag with the site I was planning on, so we'll see what happens with that. The weather here in Illinois has been unusually warm lately which reminds me that summer is right around the corner. While I'm looking forward to a break, I'm not looking forward to a summer without my husband. Good thing I'm not worrying about the future or that would really bum me out. ;)

Again, thank you all for your prayers. They are truly the reason why we are able to have peace during this time. We are so blessed to have friends and family all over the world praying for us. God is good...and BIG!

Silly Israelites

Exodus 14:11
They said to Moses, “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt?"

 I must admit that as the day draws closer for us to hear a definite "yes" or "no" (though that day could still be close to a year away), I have to daily remind myself that God is in control. On my drive to work this morning, I found myself fretting that we may have endured this long separation only to find out that all of our efforts have gone in vain and our waiver has been denied. Why would God let us spend all of the money and time we have spent only to have us end up living in Mexico? Why would he "string us along" like that? Then, I realized that at that moment, I sounded an awful lot like those silly Israelites in Exodus.

God had a miraculous plan in store them. He had delivered them from slavery and they would soon experience the miracle of the parting of the Red Sea as well as numerous other miracles.  He ultimately had planned for them to reach the Promised Land. Yet, they had zero faith in His plan and His goodness. Instead, they let fear and doubt take over and all they could see was the desert around them.

In many ways, this immigration journey has been a desert experience for me. It is easy for me to see the here and now and fear the worst possible outcome (in my eyes). Yet, along the way we have experienced so many partings of the Red Sea. The fact that Raul did not get deported on his court date in May and that we are still experiencing this journey is a sign of God's grace. We have seen God's work with our finances and the fact that we were able to pay off our large debt to the immigration lawyer and to afford my trips to visit Raul. I am sure that we have been oblivious to other workings that the Lord is doing in our lives. Yet, He is loving, gracious, merciful, and faithful.

Honestly, I am still a little scared that God's "promised land" for us may still be Mexico. Yet, I know that if it is, there will be joy and purpose there and His promised land will be far better than anything I could have planned for myself. It is obvious that God has had his hand on our lives individually and as a couple and we are not just wandering around aimlessly. He is molding us and preparing us for something greater to bring glory to Himself. God is here in my desert and I am glad that he is still faithful to me (and to us) even when my faith wavers.

I still get frustrated with the way our immigration system works and all of the hoops we must jump through. I get irritated with their timelines. I still fret that we may have made a mistake somewhere in our paperwork or that maybe the wrong person will review our case and deny us for "just because". But, then I have to return to the place where I truly believe that God is in control and that as long as we seek Him, his will will be done and there's nothing we can do to mess that up. As scary as giving up control is for me, it is still a comfort to know that I really am not in control. I ultimately come back to Exodus 14:13-14 "Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

Spring Break 2012

What a wonderful week we Gizzos had in Puebla. Thank you to all of you who prayed for us and our safety. It will be hard for me to share with you just the highlights of the trip since we had so much fun and got to spend our time in three different places--Mexico City, Puebla, and Santa Monica--but I will try not to bore you with all the details.

I arrived in Mexico City on time on Friday, March 2, despite the presence of a wintery mix of rain and snow when I left Chicago. I was very thankful that the flight was not delayed because there was really no way for me to contact Raul to tell him. He was the first smiling face that I saw when I got out of customs and he was there holding a sign that said "The Gizzos" in case I didn't recognize him. From there, we got in a taxi and rode to our hotel that Raul had secured from a sort of hotel room broker at the airport. The room was not big, but it was clean and that was all I was interested in. We stayed there Friday and Saturday night and then made our way to the city of Puebla by bus on Sunday morning. It only took us about two hours to reach our destination.

The view from the balcony of our hotel room.

We were not very impressed with the hotel that we stayed in the first night so we looked for a different one to stay in until we ventured to Santa Monica. After checking out a couple of different places we found Hotel Posada Guadelupe and were impressed with its updated rooms and free WiFi. It ended up being less expensive than our other hotel and had a much better location and view as well. I would definitely recommend it to anyone looking for a place to stay in Puebla and for only $38 per night, you can barely beat the price. Well...I guess Raul did find a much cheaper place to stay the night after I left, but when he complained that his window wouldn't shut properly, they handed him a piece of wire... :)

Hanging out at the zocalo

Though the outskirts of Puebla wasn't all that appealing, the downtown area near the square or "zocalo" was beautiful. The city was very clean and the outsides of the old building were well maintained. We spent most of our time in Puebla walking up and down the streets just looking at the little shops or sitting on a bench near the zocalo to soak in our surroundings. The temperature in Puebla was very comfortable. It was cool in the morning and evening and pleasantly warm during the day.

Outside Raul's "wing" of the house

Posing for a pic with Abuela and Lupita

We traveled to Raul's "hometown" of Santa Monica on Wednesday and arrived there around 3:00 p.m. after a four hour bus ride followed by a 45 minute taxi ride. Santa Monica is much hotter than the city of Puebla and we mainly just sat around and chatted with his grandpa until the sun went down and we could venture out to meet some of his family in the small town. I think almost everyone we met on the street was somehow related to him since both of his parents were originally from this town. I was excited to meet Abuela and Lupita in person. Lupita was very sweet and insisted that we needed to let her know the next time I was coming so she could buy a pig to slaughter. It was a lot of fun for me to see how well Raul has settled into life in his pueblito and how almost everyone knows him and jokes around with him. On top of cousins, aunts, and uncles, I met his basketball buddies and other guys that he plays cards with.

We headed back to Puebla on Friday morning and spent our last two days there. It was so nice not to have a schedule to abide by and to be able to sleep in and take naps whenever we wanted to. I also really enjoyed having Raul to lean on again. He was there to make decisions about where we would stay and how we would get there, where we would eat and how much we would tip them. It was nice to feel "married" again if that makes any sense.

We traveled to the airport in Mexico City by bus on Sunday morning for my 2:30 p.m. flight back to Chicago. As usual, I kinda fell apart when it was time for me to go through security and say good bye to the one I loved. This time was especially hard because I do not know the next time I will be able to see him. I'm hoping that the next time I see him, he will be the one coming on the plane and I will be the one picking him up from the airport, but only God knows. For now, we will have to trust God to carry us through day by day like he has so faithfully been doing.

Every time I get to see my husband, I fall more and more in love with him and am amazed that God gave me more than I could have ever asked or imagined in a husband. Raul really made me feel loved by the way he introduced me to his friends and family. Though I am definitely not the adventurous type, I felt safe with him by my side. What a blessed girl I am!

Remembering Pa Gibbs

Just a heads up that this post really has nothing to do with immigration or Mexico or anything of that nature. My dad has been on my mind a lot lately as we're nearing the date of his departure from this earth and I wanted to share with you how this precious man that I was privileged to call my father has shaped who I have become and has even influenced who I have chosen to spend the rest of my life with. I will be in Mexico on March 4th, the anniversary of his homegoing, so I thought I would post this ahead of time in honor of that date.

As I'm sure most of you are aware, Dad was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer in December of 2010 and he died a few short months later. I am blessed to be able to say that I really have no regrets when it comes to my relationship with Dad. I have many fond memories of going on tractor rides with him and tagging along in the car to go check on the crops at the different farms. Though many girls have said that their dads kinda distanced themselves from them when they started going through puberty, this time of my life did not scare my father. Perhaps it was because I was the baby of his five girls and he had plenty of practice. I always knew that no matter what, my dad was on my side. He was always there to hug me when I needed a hug and to tell me he loved me when I had a bad day. Maybe he was soft because he had all girls or maybe God gave him all girls because he created him to be a softie. Whatever the reason, my Dad was good at being a girls' daddy.

Not only did Dad treat his daughters well, but he also was a good example of a godly husband. Though he and my mom had a few "disagreements" now and then, I had no doubt that my dad was totally devoted to her. Though it was usually just meat and potatoes, my dad took his turn at preparing lunch or supper when he could and he always pitched in with the dishes. He was truly a servant to his wife and his familty, and I could tell that my mom respected him and loved him as well. Their marriage was a partnership built on Christ and serving him together. Their home was open to all of their children--from all over the world. Many people of no blood relation have seen my parents as mom and dad or grandma and grandpa over the years.

I do regret that my dad didn't get to spend very much time with Raul before he passed away. Though they are very different, they are also very much the same. I can tell that Raul loves me and he serves me much the way that my dad loved and served my mom. Dad set the bar very high, but my I'm sure that my husband can live up to my dad's example with the Lord's help. One of the most precious memories that I have was from one of the last times that I was with my dad. Raul and I were taking him to the ER in the middle of the night because of blood clots in his leg. I was in the driver's seat and dad was already in the truck as well and Dad asked, "Where's my boy?". He was referring to Raul and at that moment, it became clear to me that Dad thought of Raul as his son. Before Dad died, we were talking about how Raul was going to take care of me and he said, "I love that boy." Me too, Dad. Me, too.

I miss my dad so very much and as I type this tribute to him, I'm wiping away the tears. Yet, I know that I will see him again one day. Thank you, Lord, for this godly man you gave me to call my father. Thank you for his faithfulness to you. May Raul and I live up to the example that he and Mom have set before us. Amen.

In Juarez Again

Raul began his journey to Juarez Wednesday morning.  He stayed overnight at the airport in Mexico City last night so that he could catch his early morning flight to Juarez this morning. His appointment at the Consulate is tomorrow morning at 11:00 a.m.  Unlike last time in Juarez, Raul had a friendly American face greet him at the airport when he arrived. A friend in Iowa told us of her missionary friend, Jim, who lives in Juarez where he and his wife are involved in a variety of ministries. I was able to contact him by phone and he offered to pick Raul up from the airport and to even let Raul stay in their home until Raul flies back to Mexico City. We are so thankful for his acts of kindness.

I just got off the phone with Raul and he seems to be in better spirits than his last visit to Juarez. I suppose part of the reason is that he knows more what to expect this go around. But, I also think he's enjoying being able to stay with Jim (his wife is currently in the States) and Jim's two dogs. Apparently, one of the dogs is very big and fluffy and has been a good source of stress relief for Raul already.

Turning in the waiver tomorrow is our final step in the process. From there, we just wait, and wait, and wait... :) As I said before, we will get a letter in about two months either stating that Raul has been approved for his visa and he can head back home to the States or stating that his case has been sent for further review. If that happens, we will probably have to wait 8 or 9 more months before we hear if he got approved or denied. There is a high likelihood that our case will be sent for further review since it is more complicated than many. However, God can do miracles, so nothing is certain at this point.

I will be relieved when the waiting is over, but the closer we get to a final answer, the more anxious I get. It feels like we are approaching our court date last May all over again. The only thing that keeps me sane (other than know that God's will will be done) is the fact that no matter what the verdict is, I will finally be able to reunite with my husband and live in the same home again. However, I am still really hoping that home happens to be in Waukegan!

For now, we are looking forward to my visit in the beginning of March. I will be with Raul on the anniversary of my dad's homegoing on March 4th and I'm glad that I will be there with him on that day since he has been so supportive through the whole thing. Thankfully, my mother will be able to be with my sister and family so she will have support as well.

Thank you everyone for your encouragement and prayers. Please hold Raul up in prayer tomorrow morning at 11:00 a.m. (Juarez time, which is one hour behind Illinois time) as he has his waiver appointment.

Panama Pics for the non-facebookers

 For those of you who aren't on facebook, here are just a few of the pictures that have been posted lately. Since my mother had two cameras with her and Raul had ours, we have a total of 6,000 pictures from the trip. Luckily, my mother will be the one who gets to sort through all of them and edit them. Enjoy!

http://s1119.photobucket.com/albums/k630/thegizzos/Panama/

Feelin' the love

Well, the Gizzos have officially been the Gizzos for a year, now. Yesterday was the anniversary of our civil marriage at the courthouse in Waukegan. What a crazy ride we have been on, but I am still very much in love with the man I call my husband. Though Raul did not remember that it was our anniversary yesterday, I assured him that he had one more chance to remember our anniversary before I would be upset. Here's hopin' that  the April date goes better for him...! :) Poor guy, he was thinking we were married on the 23rd of January since the April date was the 23rd.

Though I just returned from my Panamanian vacation, I am now busy planning my next vacation to Mexico in March. Just when I was afraid that funds were running too low to visit Raul another time, a couple from our church offered to buy my plane ticket to Mexico for Spring break. Now that was an offer I couldn't refuse! This time, I will be flying into Mexico City and Raul will meet me there. We will probably stay there one or two nights and then head to Puebla. From what I have read online, the city of Puebla is supposed to be nice and has a lot of cultural tourist attractions. Raul says that if I'm on my best behavior, he will take me to Santa Monica to visit his family and see where he lives since it is only 3 to 4 hours away from where we will be staying in Puebla. He is estimating that one day there will probably be as much as this white girl can handle. I am excited to see where my love has been living these past few months.

We continue to be amazed at the generosity of our friends and family and we feel very blessed to have so many close friends. In addition to my upcoming vacation, I have been spoiled by friends for my upcoming birthday. Their thoughtful gifts have meant so much to me, and I know Raul appreciates my people here taking care of me since this is the first time since I cannot even remember when that he will not be able to celebrate my birthday with me. Even when we were on a "break" in our relationship, he somehow found a way to take me out for my birthdays. I did get the chance to celebrate my birthday with his family today and it was nice to hang out with them again.

Thank you to all of you who continue to pray for us and encourage us with your thoughtful words and acts. Please keep February 10th in your prayers as this is the date that Raul travels to Juarez to submit our waiver. Then it's waiting, waiting, waiting. Much prayer is needed for that part as well!