Silly Israelites

Exodus 14:11
They said to Moses, “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt?"

 I must admit that as the day draws closer for us to hear a definite "yes" or "no" (though that day could still be close to a year away), I have to daily remind myself that God is in control. On my drive to work this morning, I found myself fretting that we may have endured this long separation only to find out that all of our efforts have gone in vain and our waiver has been denied. Why would God let us spend all of the money and time we have spent only to have us end up living in Mexico? Why would he "string us along" like that? Then, I realized that at that moment, I sounded an awful lot like those silly Israelites in Exodus.

God had a miraculous plan in store them. He had delivered them from slavery and they would soon experience the miracle of the parting of the Red Sea as well as numerous other miracles.  He ultimately had planned for them to reach the Promised Land. Yet, they had zero faith in His plan and His goodness. Instead, they let fear and doubt take over and all they could see was the desert around them.

In many ways, this immigration journey has been a desert experience for me. It is easy for me to see the here and now and fear the worst possible outcome (in my eyes). Yet, along the way we have experienced so many partings of the Red Sea. The fact that Raul did not get deported on his court date in May and that we are still experiencing this journey is a sign of God's grace. We have seen God's work with our finances and the fact that we were able to pay off our large debt to the immigration lawyer and to afford my trips to visit Raul. I am sure that we have been oblivious to other workings that the Lord is doing in our lives. Yet, He is loving, gracious, merciful, and faithful.

Honestly, I am still a little scared that God's "promised land" for us may still be Mexico. Yet, I know that if it is, there will be joy and purpose there and His promised land will be far better than anything I could have planned for myself. It is obvious that God has had his hand on our lives individually and as a couple and we are not just wandering around aimlessly. He is molding us and preparing us for something greater to bring glory to Himself. God is here in my desert and I am glad that he is still faithful to me (and to us) even when my faith wavers.

I still get frustrated with the way our immigration system works and all of the hoops we must jump through. I get irritated with their timelines. I still fret that we may have made a mistake somewhere in our paperwork or that maybe the wrong person will review our case and deny us for "just because". But, then I have to return to the place where I truly believe that God is in control and that as long as we seek Him, his will will be done and there's nothing we can do to mess that up. As scary as giving up control is for me, it is still a comfort to know that I really am not in control. I ultimately come back to Exodus 14:13-14 "Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”