An All American (hopefully!) Love Story

 One year ago today, Raul and I stood before God, our family, and our friends and pledged to love, honor, and cherish each other for the rest of our lives. I cannot believe that a year has already flown by. So much has happened between then and now, but I am more happy than ever that I am Mrs. Mozo (or Mrs. Modigidii as some may know me).

Though many of you who are reading probably already know "our story", I thought I would fill the rest of you in in honor of our one year anniversary. Our love story is much like everyone else' and much different than everyone else' at the same time. Looking back, we can see how God's hand was on us each step of the way and how he brought us to the place where we are now.

Raul and I met at a meeting for those who were interested in being part of a church plant called Journey Church. I was intrigued by this Christian bad-boy who had grown up in such a different world. Raul grew up in Waukegan and had been exposed to a lot different "life experiences" than I had in my sheltered farm community in Iowa. Though Raul caught my attention immediately, it wasn't until I started tutoring him in math for his GED that we really got to know each other. Pretty soon one tutoring session a week turned into two. And then, tutoring turned into lets just watch a movie instead.

 Many of our Journey Church friends can probably recall the camping trip where it was obvious that we were interested in each other. It rained the entire trip, so we were forced to spend most of the evening and night in our tents. Raul's was next to mine and we carried on a conversation into the wee hours of the morning. The problem was that we didn't realize that everyone else heard our conversation since we both had to yell over the noise of the rain. Soon after this trip, Raul finally asked me out on our first date and we became "official".

However, something just didn't feel right and we broke up. But, we remained good friends and spoke on the phone frequently. We did eventually get back together and we dated for a couple of years. Then we were to the point where we either needed to make some wedding plans or go our separate ways. There were some things in our relationship that needed work and after praying about it, we both came to the conclusion that we should go our separate ways. I was heart broken, but I still had a peace from God that we had done the right thing. Raul did his thing and I did mine, yet we remained friends and saw each other at church.

During our time apart, Raul was working through some things in his own life and I decided that I needed to assess where I was headed. I had planned on marrying him and living happily ever after, but that wasn't looking like it would ever happen. I decided to go back to school and started really enjoying my life as a student. People kept trying to set me up with guys and I really longed to find someone and to be married, but part of me just didn't want anyone but Raul. I went back and forth between being content with being single and then freaking out that I would never get married since I was nearing my late twenties with no prospects.

Raul went to Las Vegas for a little while and I was sure that I would never hear from him again. Yet, I was one of the first people he called when he got back. He began getting more and more involved with leading the Youth Group at church and little by little, he was turning into the guy that I had always wanted him to be. We started talking more and more on the phone and then we would look for excuses to hang out with each other. Yet, something was holding me back from wanting to commit to a relationship. Raul was still in the midst of his immigration battle and the last thing I wanted to do was to put myself in a position where I would have to move to Mexico!

So, for a long while, we were "just friends" who talked on the phone everyday and occasionally hung out. Then came the fateful day in November, 2009. Raul was supposed to lead small group that evening, but he failed to show up. He didn't answer his phone and no one knew where he was. Later that night, I got a phone call. When I picked up the phone, I heard "will you accept a phone call from inmate number something at the Lake County Jail." Immediately, I knew it was him. Raul had been pulled over for a traffic violation and before releasing him, they ran his name in the immigration database. He had been flagged and they were holding him. I didn't get to talk that long with him and I was a mess for the next two days until I heard from him.  At that point, I feared that he would be deported on the spot and I would never see him again.To spare a you any more details, Raul was released a couple of days later, but the ball was rolling with immigration and he would soon have a court appearance.

From that point on, we were pretty much dating, yet I was really struggling with making it "official" again. I still didn't know if I could leave my country and family for this guy even though I loved him. One night, I had a heart to heart talk with God. I told him that if he wanted us together, he would have to make me so in love with Raul that I would be willing to follow him anywhere. And...that's exactly what happened. We soon became official and our relationship this time was much different than it had looked before. God was the center and we connected with each other on a much deeper level.

On December 11, 2010, Raul told me to sit down because he had something to tell me. I immediately said no because I thought he was going to tell me something bad. He kept asking to hold my hand and I said no because I thought he had done something wrong and he was just trying to soften the blow. Over and over he said, "I have something to tell you can I hold your hand?" Finally, I told him to "just spit it out!" The rest was a blur but somewhere during that time he had gotten on his knee and pulled out a ring. I said, "Are you for real?!" And, that was that! After 7 years of dating off and on, we were finally engaged!

Raul's first immigration court date was at the end of January, and we found out that there was a slight possibility that if it didn't go well, he could be detained and then deported. We made a quick decision to get married prior to that date since I was bound and determined that we would be married in the U.S. I would have preferred to have a ceremony in a church, but my dad had just been diagnosed with lung cancer and was to receive his first chemo treatment, so he couldn't travel. Since my dad wouldn't be able to give me away, we decided that a civil service in the court house would do and then we would have a church wedding if Raul's court date went okay. So, only a month after we got engaged, we were married!

I had originally planned to have our church wedding in June but we decided to move it to April since my dad wasn't doing well. It turns out that my dad wasn't able to give me away anyway since he passed away in March. Though the civil wedding was not in my original plans, it turned out to be a blessing since Dad knew before he died that Raul and I were married and that Raul would take care of me.

On April 23rd, 2011, three hundred of our friends and family celebrated our marriage with us in Waukegan. That day is a bit of a blur to me, but I remember being happy that our marriage ceremony truly was a celebration of God bringing us together. Sometimes I still find it hard to believe that we actually ended up together. What a relief to know that I will get to do life with my best friend by my side. We make a good team and I cannot wait until we get to live together again. Thank you, Lord, for my husband Mr. Modigidii. He is truly a gift from you.

A New Timeline

 Mark 8:35-36

"If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake and for the sake of the Good News, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?"

The Scripture above really hit home for me in this time of waiting. We still have no idea when we will hear from immigration. According to the old timeline, we should've gotten a letter by today stating whether our waiver was approved or whether we were sent for further review. However, it appears that things have changed and the fast track now takes from 2 to 6 months to hear something and the slow track may have to wait an additional 6 months beyond that. So, we really have no idea where we are on the waiting timeline or even which track we're on. All we know is that we are waiting and trusting (or at least trying to trust).

So, why did this passage in Mark speak to me so much? Much of my daily battle is in giving up "my life" for God's life that he has called us to live. God's desire for The Gizzos is that we live the life he has called us to live and the point of that life is not our comfort but for us to bring Him glory and to lead others to Him. I go between arguing with God that really the best place for us is the U.S. and trusting that this is part of his plan and that wherever we end up, He will use our lives as living sacrifices for him. What a joy there can be in living life for the One who created it. Ultimately, my (our) heart's desire is to do what God has called us to do and be where God has called us to be, but sometimes my mind has a little trouble catching  up with my heart!

Raul's phone lines were down for most of last week and a couple of days this week. When we did get to talk, he had much to catch me up on.The biggest news is that he is now a kind of volunteer police officer there in Santa Monica. He was talked into volunteering after some of the other volunteers observed him breaking up some fights and helping an older gentleman back to his home after a celebration. Wednesday nights he is on duty and completes rounds to make sure that stores are closed by a certain time and to generally keep an eye on things. He gets his official credentials and t-shirt at the end of this month! I can't wait to see pictures of my man in uniform! ;)

There's nothing much to report in my neck of the woods. I am planning on visiting Raul in the beginning of July when I get more vacation time for work. Deciding when to buy the tickets has been a bit tricky because I don't really want to throw away money on the off chance that Raul will get approved to come home earlier than thought. However, I don't think I'll even care about the wasted ticket if that's the case!

Thanks again for your love, support, and prayers and keep 'em coming!

Still waiting...patiently (or something)

Exodus 16:8

Moses also said, “You will know that it was the LORD when he gives you meat to eat in the evening and all the bread you want in the morning, because he has heard your grumbling against him. Who are we? You are not grumbling against us, but against the LORD.” 

When I was sharing with Raul all of the lessons I've been learning from those rebellious Israelite people, we discovered that we had both been making our way through the book of Exodus. Raul is speeding through it compared to me, but nonetheless, it has been really fun for us to be able to discuss what we're learning when we talk on the phone. For some reason (probably the Holy Spirit) we're both noticing things about the book that we had never noticed before. My insight from today was a little bit painful. In Exodus 16, God's chosen people seem to have again forgotten the many miracles that God had just performed for them and that he had delivered them from slavery. Instead of choosing to be excited about what God would do next, they decided to complain to Moses about their lack of food. However, they were ultimately complaining about (and to) God. Yet, God was merciful and provided them with manna and quail.

I came to the realization that I too am a complainer. Okay, that wasn't really a new revelation. But, the application that I came up with was a new one. Every time I complain about immigration and how long it takes for them to do anything, I am really complaining about God's timing and his plan he has for us. Ouch! Thank goodness he is merciful, eh?!

I must admit that I am getting antsy to hear something (even if it is that we have been sent for further review). According to the timeline they gave Raul, we have from about 1 to 5 more weeks to wait for the letter. Good thing I have learned my lesson about having patience and not complaining! ;)

There's really not much new to report. Raul was told by his municipal that since he's been living there a while, he has to do some work around the town like everyone else. So, tomorrow is his first day of "service" and he will be helping to pave a road. He has also been helping Lupita build a pen for her new pig that she purchased and has been watching the new baby chicks that hatched under his kitchen table--11 in all. I'm telling you, we're fixing to move to a farm in Iowa when he gets back so he feels at home! 

I've been keeping busy with homework as the end of the semester draws closer. I am hoping to do my practicum next Fall but I've hit a snag with the site I was planning on, so we'll see what happens with that. The weather here in Illinois has been unusually warm lately which reminds me that summer is right around the corner. While I'm looking forward to a break, I'm not looking forward to a summer without my husband. Good thing I'm not worrying about the future or that would really bum me out. ;)

Again, thank you all for your prayers. They are truly the reason why we are able to have peace during this time. We are so blessed to have friends and family all over the world praying for us. God is good...and BIG!

Silly Israelites

Exodus 14:11
They said to Moses, “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt?"

 I must admit that as the day draws closer for us to hear a definite "yes" or "no" (though that day could still be close to a year away), I have to daily remind myself that God is in control. On my drive to work this morning, I found myself fretting that we may have endured this long separation only to find out that all of our efforts have gone in vain and our waiver has been denied. Why would God let us spend all of the money and time we have spent only to have us end up living in Mexico? Why would he "string us along" like that? Then, I realized that at that moment, I sounded an awful lot like those silly Israelites in Exodus.

God had a miraculous plan in store them. He had delivered them from slavery and they would soon experience the miracle of the parting of the Red Sea as well as numerous other miracles.  He ultimately had planned for them to reach the Promised Land. Yet, they had zero faith in His plan and His goodness. Instead, they let fear and doubt take over and all they could see was the desert around them.

In many ways, this immigration journey has been a desert experience for me. It is easy for me to see the here and now and fear the worst possible outcome (in my eyes). Yet, along the way we have experienced so many partings of the Red Sea. The fact that Raul did not get deported on his court date in May and that we are still experiencing this journey is a sign of God's grace. We have seen God's work with our finances and the fact that we were able to pay off our large debt to the immigration lawyer and to afford my trips to visit Raul. I am sure that we have been oblivious to other workings that the Lord is doing in our lives. Yet, He is loving, gracious, merciful, and faithful.

Honestly, I am still a little scared that God's "promised land" for us may still be Mexico. Yet, I know that if it is, there will be joy and purpose there and His promised land will be far better than anything I could have planned for myself. It is obvious that God has had his hand on our lives individually and as a couple and we are not just wandering around aimlessly. He is molding us and preparing us for something greater to bring glory to Himself. God is here in my desert and I am glad that he is still faithful to me (and to us) even when my faith wavers.

I still get frustrated with the way our immigration system works and all of the hoops we must jump through. I get irritated with their timelines. I still fret that we may have made a mistake somewhere in our paperwork or that maybe the wrong person will review our case and deny us for "just because". But, then I have to return to the place where I truly believe that God is in control and that as long as we seek Him, his will will be done and there's nothing we can do to mess that up. As scary as giving up control is for me, it is still a comfort to know that I really am not in control. I ultimately come back to Exodus 14:13-14 "Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

Spring Break 2012

What a wonderful week we Gizzos had in Puebla. Thank you to all of you who prayed for us and our safety. It will be hard for me to share with you just the highlights of the trip since we had so much fun and got to spend our time in three different places--Mexico City, Puebla, and Santa Monica--but I will try not to bore you with all the details.

I arrived in Mexico City on time on Friday, March 2, despite the presence of a wintery mix of rain and snow when I left Chicago. I was very thankful that the flight was not delayed because there was really no way for me to contact Raul to tell him. He was the first smiling face that I saw when I got out of customs and he was there holding a sign that said "The Gizzos" in case I didn't recognize him. From there, we got in a taxi and rode to our hotel that Raul had secured from a sort of hotel room broker at the airport. The room was not big, but it was clean and that was all I was interested in. We stayed there Friday and Saturday night and then made our way to the city of Puebla by bus on Sunday morning. It only took us about two hours to reach our destination.

The view from the balcony of our hotel room.

We were not very impressed with the hotel that we stayed in the first night so we looked for a different one to stay in until we ventured to Santa Monica. After checking out a couple of different places we found Hotel Posada Guadelupe and were impressed with its updated rooms and free WiFi. It ended up being less expensive than our other hotel and had a much better location and view as well. I would definitely recommend it to anyone looking for a place to stay in Puebla and for only $38 per night, you can barely beat the price. Well...I guess Raul did find a much cheaper place to stay the night after I left, but when he complained that his window wouldn't shut properly, they handed him a piece of wire... :)

Hanging out at the zocalo

Though the outskirts of Puebla wasn't all that appealing, the downtown area near the square or "zocalo" was beautiful. The city was very clean and the outsides of the old building were well maintained. We spent most of our time in Puebla walking up and down the streets just looking at the little shops or sitting on a bench near the zocalo to soak in our surroundings. The temperature in Puebla was very comfortable. It was cool in the morning and evening and pleasantly warm during the day.

Outside Raul's "wing" of the house

Posing for a pic with Abuela and Lupita

We traveled to Raul's "hometown" of Santa Monica on Wednesday and arrived there around 3:00 p.m. after a four hour bus ride followed by a 45 minute taxi ride. Santa Monica is much hotter than the city of Puebla and we mainly just sat around and chatted with his grandpa until the sun went down and we could venture out to meet some of his family in the small town. I think almost everyone we met on the street was somehow related to him since both of his parents were originally from this town. I was excited to meet Abuela and Lupita in person. Lupita was very sweet and insisted that we needed to let her know the next time I was coming so she could buy a pig to slaughter. It was a lot of fun for me to see how well Raul has settled into life in his pueblito and how almost everyone knows him and jokes around with him. On top of cousins, aunts, and uncles, I met his basketball buddies and other guys that he plays cards with.

We headed back to Puebla on Friday morning and spent our last two days there. It was so nice not to have a schedule to abide by and to be able to sleep in and take naps whenever we wanted to. I also really enjoyed having Raul to lean on again. He was there to make decisions about where we would stay and how we would get there, where we would eat and how much we would tip them. It was nice to feel "married" again if that makes any sense.

We traveled to the airport in Mexico City by bus on Sunday morning for my 2:30 p.m. flight back to Chicago. As usual, I kinda fell apart when it was time for me to go through security and say good bye to the one I loved. This time was especially hard because I do not know the next time I will be able to see him. I'm hoping that the next time I see him, he will be the one coming on the plane and I will be the one picking him up from the airport, but only God knows. For now, we will have to trust God to carry us through day by day like he has so faithfully been doing.

Every time I get to see my husband, I fall more and more in love with him and am amazed that God gave me more than I could have ever asked or imagined in a husband. Raul really made me feel loved by the way he introduced me to his friends and family. Though I am definitely not the adventurous type, I felt safe with him by my side. What a blessed girl I am!

Remembering Pa Gibbs

Just a heads up that this post really has nothing to do with immigration or Mexico or anything of that nature. My dad has been on my mind a lot lately as we're nearing the date of his departure from this earth and I wanted to share with you how this precious man that I was privileged to call my father has shaped who I have become and has even influenced who I have chosen to spend the rest of my life with. I will be in Mexico on March 4th, the anniversary of his homegoing, so I thought I would post this ahead of time in honor of that date.

As I'm sure most of you are aware, Dad was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer in December of 2010 and he died a few short months later. I am blessed to be able to say that I really have no regrets when it comes to my relationship with Dad. I have many fond memories of going on tractor rides with him and tagging along in the car to go check on the crops at the different farms. Though many girls have said that their dads kinda distanced themselves from them when they started going through puberty, this time of my life did not scare my father. Perhaps it was because I was the baby of his five girls and he had plenty of practice. I always knew that no matter what, my dad was on my side. He was always there to hug me when I needed a hug and to tell me he loved me when I had a bad day. Maybe he was soft because he had all girls or maybe God gave him all girls because he created him to be a softie. Whatever the reason, my Dad was good at being a girls' daddy.

Not only did Dad treat his daughters well, but he also was a good example of a godly husband. Though he and my mom had a few "disagreements" now and then, I had no doubt that my dad was totally devoted to her. Though it was usually just meat and potatoes, my dad took his turn at preparing lunch or supper when he could and he always pitched in with the dishes. He was truly a servant to his wife and his familty, and I could tell that my mom respected him and loved him as well. Their marriage was a partnership built on Christ and serving him together. Their home was open to all of their children--from all over the world. Many people of no blood relation have seen my parents as mom and dad or grandma and grandpa over the years.

I do regret that my dad didn't get to spend very much time with Raul before he passed away. Though they are very different, they are also very much the same. I can tell that Raul loves me and he serves me much the way that my dad loved and served my mom. Dad set the bar very high, but my I'm sure that my husband can live up to my dad's example with the Lord's help. One of the most precious memories that I have was from one of the last times that I was with my dad. Raul and I were taking him to the ER in the middle of the night because of blood clots in his leg. I was in the driver's seat and dad was already in the truck as well and Dad asked, "Where's my boy?". He was referring to Raul and at that moment, it became clear to me that Dad thought of Raul as his son. Before Dad died, we were talking about how Raul was going to take care of me and he said, "I love that boy." Me too, Dad. Me, too.

I miss my dad so very much and as I type this tribute to him, I'm wiping away the tears. Yet, I know that I will see him again one day. Thank you, Lord, for this godly man you gave me to call my father. Thank you for his faithfulness to you. May Raul and I live up to the example that he and Mom have set before us. Amen.

In Juarez Again

Raul began his journey to Juarez Wednesday morning.  He stayed overnight at the airport in Mexico City last night so that he could catch his early morning flight to Juarez this morning. His appointment at the Consulate is tomorrow morning at 11:00 a.m.  Unlike last time in Juarez, Raul had a friendly American face greet him at the airport when he arrived. A friend in Iowa told us of her missionary friend, Jim, who lives in Juarez where he and his wife are involved in a variety of ministries. I was able to contact him by phone and he offered to pick Raul up from the airport and to even let Raul stay in their home until Raul flies back to Mexico City. We are so thankful for his acts of kindness.

I just got off the phone with Raul and he seems to be in better spirits than his last visit to Juarez. I suppose part of the reason is that he knows more what to expect this go around. But, I also think he's enjoying being able to stay with Jim (his wife is currently in the States) and Jim's two dogs. Apparently, one of the dogs is very big and fluffy and has been a good source of stress relief for Raul already.

Turning in the waiver tomorrow is our final step in the process. From there, we just wait, and wait, and wait... :) As I said before, we will get a letter in about two months either stating that Raul has been approved for his visa and he can head back home to the States or stating that his case has been sent for further review. If that happens, we will probably have to wait 8 or 9 more months before we hear if he got approved or denied. There is a high likelihood that our case will be sent for further review since it is more complicated than many. However, God can do miracles, so nothing is certain at this point.

I will be relieved when the waiting is over, but the closer we get to a final answer, the more anxious I get. It feels like we are approaching our court date last May all over again. The only thing that keeps me sane (other than know that God's will will be done) is the fact that no matter what the verdict is, I will finally be able to reunite with my husband and live in the same home again. However, I am still really hoping that home happens to be in Waukegan!

For now, we are looking forward to my visit in the beginning of March. I will be with Raul on the anniversary of my dad's homegoing on March 4th and I'm glad that I will be there with him on that day since he has been so supportive through the whole thing. Thankfully, my mother will be able to be with my sister and family so she will have support as well.

Thank you everyone for your encouragement and prayers. Please hold Raul up in prayer tomorrow morning at 11:00 a.m. (Juarez time, which is one hour behind Illinois time) as he has his waiver appointment.